lonelywhiteasian:

my dash is dead so i’m gonna liven it up with some fun, family-friendly text posts. let’s start this off, shall we? what’s brown and sticky?…. …. you guessed it…. … a stick! hahaha we’re all having fun here

harrysthefather:

cokeflow:

I wish people thought I was funny instead of attractive

i wish i had your problems

runintoyourheart:

WHY AM I EMBARRASSED WHEN I’M BUYING FEMININE PRODUCTS IT’S SO STUPID BECAUSE EVERYONE KNOWS THAT PERIODS EXIST AND THAT LADIES NEED SHIT TO TAKE CARE OF THAT MONSTROSITY YET EVERY TIME I HAVE TO BUY SOME I TRY TO COVER IT UP WITH OTHER STUFF OR PRETEND I’M HOLDING SOMETHING DIFFERENT LIKE I WANT TO BE ABLE TO WALK DOWN THE STORE AISLE WITH PRIDE LIKE “YEAH I FUCKING BLEED OUT OF MY HOO HA SO FUCKING WHAT YOU WANNA FIGHT ABOUT IT I’LL TAKE YOU DOWN MOTHERFUCKER”

(Source: lazeramsey)

OHSNAP. I HAD TO GO GET A SNORKEL BECAUSE I AM DROWNING IN MY OWN TEARS FROM THAT INSULT

nakedongreenbeers:

If I ever get married my wedding vows will include “because life is long and you are hot” and no one can stop me.